Fuck walking!

So, I used to ALWAYS go on long-ass walks for the sake of walking....but my beloved mamachari has poisoned my love for the "sport!" Today I decided to walk instead of bike to Co-op, which is a 30-second bike ride/2-minute walk, and that was a big decision! I just got back from picking up my old bike from the station, which is a 5-minute ride/15-minute walk....but I may as well have walked to fucking Tokyo, it felt like it took so long. The whole time I was bitterly thinking, "If I was on my bike I'd be there by now grumble grumble....." This must be the way people with cars think! Must be nice to be one of them ;)

SAVE ME

K, so when one moves to Japan, one brings a shitload of deodorant with them, because it is hard to find here, and the stuff that is here is weak or weird spray-on stuff. One would assume that without deodorant, the whole country would smell of BO, but Japanese people somehow sweat WAY less than nasty gaijin, and it usually isn’t a problem. However, certain people seem to be making up for the ENTIRE Japanese population when it comes to body odor! There is this one teacher here who is like four desks away from me who always stinks. However, he’s rarely at his desk, so it usually isn’t a problem. On the new schedule, however, I appear to have a free period with him in which I get to take a wild adventure into his nasty armpits and never escape! What the fuck! He is like four desks away from me and it smells like I am inside his fucking t-shirt! I can’t breathe!!!! Saaaaaaaave meeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Japanification, Indeed

It's a sad day when you are at the store, see a pear for "only" $1.50, giddily purchase it, and get extremely excited about the amazing deal you just found. Oh, well, it's muy delicioso!

Signs your son may be a big mo

So, I just got the most homosexual (and, hence, greatest) package in the world from my mom! It contained: these lemon tea biscuits that my mom got me hooked on (damn her!), white tea face moisturizer, facial scrub, and the first season of Desperate Housewives. Um, hello, how much do I love my mommy???

K, days off are boring

I took today off to rest, and I can't freaking fall asleep! Grr. Thank god for the internet and DVDs! And thanks to those who updated their blogs today and entertained me. What did people do before blogs? Cindy updated her blog today (Cindy, I'm afraid you're not allowed to have visitors again if it means you won't post on a regular basis. Sorry!), as did Nicky, whose post is particularly amusing (the one entitled "Band This"). To those reading this who don't have blogs, what are you waiting for (especially you, Miss Royle!)? Don't be old-fashioned and COMMUNICATE with people to tell them what you think. That's just craziness.

K, back to tea and TV.

Byokyu

So, I feel bad today because I took a sick day. I'm not a big fat liar or anything, as I do feel really crappy and can't imagine having the energy or loud voice to teach today, but I still feel bad (especially since Japanese people like NEVER take sick days). Hrm. Oh, well, it will make me genki for tomorrow, I suppose!

I haven't been able to nap yet, so I have been taking care of VERY important matters....such as cutting magazines and advertisements for my man wall ;) It's gonna be hot! I dunno where I should put it, tho? Somewhere in the living room, hmm. We shall see.

I also put new photos on my photos page. Like half of them have already been on the blog, but my parents don't know about my blog, so I have to show them on there. But some are new. Yup.

Last night's "Diner's Club" (Veronica's amusing name for the Ota potlucks) was fun! Thanks, Cindy! The carbonara was muy oishii!

I got an E-Mail from Kris (my sister) today, and my parents gave her a VERY cool birthday present....a ticket to come see me! So, she will definitely be coming in the spring, YAY! Muy excitedo, yo!

K, time to continue my day-long TV marathon....I am going to be so damn bored by this evening!

Wednesday

Um, I totally can't think of an original title for this post. Anyway! So, today is Wednesday, which means I had shougakkou. I made the mistake (?) of having two cups of coffee, one cup of tea and half a vitamin drink (Japanese hardcore energy drink...you know they're strong when they come in tiny bottles) before my first class. When the 6nensei came in I was fucking high as hell and like, "OKAYYYYY, WHOOOOOO WANTS TO STUDY EEEEEEEENGLISH, WOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I was a little worried about my heart, but it all turned out well!

Actually, all of my classes went EXTREMELY well today, which was really cool. Key to making Japanese kids happy: play as many variations of janken (rock paper scissors) as humanly possible. I think I used it in like four of five classes today. Anyway, fun was had by all. I love my shougakkou kids (and apparently they love me, thanks to some insider information, awww!).

Once again, I had the most filling kyushoku ever, at shougakkou! What's up with that?! Not that I'm complaining. It was really good today, too. K, had to talk about food :)

Unfortunately for the kids, it was pouring today for like six hours straight, so they couldn't go to recess after lunch. So, what did they do instead of playing outside? One might assume that they could go play in the gym, or at least talk with their friends. That would be pure insanity, tho, because it is completely natural for them to do a deep cleaning of the school instead! What kind of recess is that?! They were all hunched over cleaning the floor, stairs, everything you could find! Poor kids.

After school I bonded with a teacher by translating a letter she wrote into English for her. Maybe I can put on my resume that I'm a translator on the side ;)

K, proof that Japanese people are too organized:

1. A couple weeks ago some city person called for me at school and asked if I had plans on JANUARY 19th! Um, what the hell?! "Well, I might go out with friends that night, but I'm waiting to hear back from them." Weirdos! Apparently I am talking about America for an hour that night.

2. We had to make a lesson plan after school today for the open house the school is having on November 19th (a Saturday). I am not amused that I am teaching on a Saturday, but I also realized today that that is the day of the Ashikaga Wine Festival! Hello, I am totally going to be like "er, I have plans, see ya!" and get drunk off my ass. Oh, well, at least the lesson will be fun.

Anyway, tonight is the weekly Ota ALT dinner, which is at Cindy's house this week. Should be fun! Gotta go catch my train on my impotence-causing bike...... (I was wondering why I hadn't gotten any girls pregnant since coming here)

Mamachari riders, beware!

An amusing article for you to read while bored at work.

Happy Birthday, Kurisu!!!

Now that it is officially October 4th in Oregon, I can say HAPPY BIRTHDAY, KRIS! I demand you go drink yummy cocktails for me (ones that aren't made of tea or strange Japanese juices).

For those of you who don't know, Kris is my sister....I believe she will make her Japan debut this spring, so you'd best all meet her, yo!

Random thoughts, as usual

1. Even tho my students can be scary and/or appear to hate me in class, they are really freaking cool in the hallways. I feel like the most popular person in the world when I walk to class. They all give me high-fives, say hello to me, joke with me, etc. Yay for cool kids!

2. So I made these scrambled sentences for my 3nensei groups to make correct sentences, and it’s interesting how they can get the answer incorrect, but still have the English correct. For example, one was “I don’t like the winter because cold weather makes me sad” (not true, btw), but some of them did “I don’t like winter weather because the cold makes me sad,” which works (at least I think it works….fuck, I can’t speak English anymore). Anyway, a more interesting one was meant to be, “My roommate taught me how to cook Mexican food,” (yes… “roommate!” Hehehe), but turned out to be “My Mexican roommate taught me how to cook food.” I figure that is correct, too, hee hee.

3. It is getting colder lately, and as a result I haven’t had nearly enough naked time in my house. Am I the only one not enjoying this?

4. Yay for people making comments on my blog! I know people are reading it, ESPECIALLY LAZY ONES IN AMERICA WHO ARE NOT COMMENTING. Stop using me for my amazing wit and then just abandoning me….leave some comment love, bitches!

Daily Lunchtime Post

So, as far as I know, garbage disposals don’t exist in Japan, but I am changing that by becoming the human garbage disposal at work! Whenever there are any sort of leftovers, they’re like “dou shiyou kana (What should we do?)….” Then immediately look at the big fat gaijin. Of course, I’m always happy to oblige in my duties. At least they pay attention to me in important times of need! Today I got an extra bowl of “brown stew” (um, maybe we could work on making a more appetizing name for that, people).

Myra pointed out that my blog is about three things: eating, alcohol, and teaching, so I had to include the upper post to continue these themes!

Last night I continued my recent TV addiction. Well, who am I kidding with the word “recent” TV addiction. Rather, recent addiction to downloading American TV. Lately I have been catching up on The OC, Desperate Housewives, Alias, Arrested Development, and Lost. So good! I am almost 3/4 through the first season of Lost, then I can finally watch the season two episodes I have downloaded, woot. I love that damn show! Sean, you had better be addicted and have watched at least 2 of the 3 discs I lent you by now.

Last night I also got to talk to Eduardo for a minute, which made me happy, yay. AND I went to bed EARLY for once and got a good night’s sleep. I didn’t know such a thing was possible! I have been sooooo tired lately, and I have been getting sick for like three weeks, I just want my body to give up so I can get rid of the damn cold by now. Anyway, I got around 8 hours of sleep and came to school in a good mood for once, which was nice. AND I was in a good mood because I got to chat with Eduardo for 15 minutes this morning! I miss my mexinugget…(hmm, for some strange reason Microsoft Word is questioning that word)

Since I have been told I write novels on this blog (hmph!), I will end this post now…I’m sure I will be back before the day is over!

While at work, think about vacations!

So, in November I believe Cindy, me and a couple Saitama ALTs are heading to Korea for a long weekend of eating and shopping (‘cause, really, there is nothing else to do in Korea). It should be fun! I am craving traveling like none other, so hopefully that will satisfy me for a bit.

For winter break, I am pretty sure I’m going to Thailand. What is everyone else doing? I know Jenny will be there (and Sean should go, screw America!), is anyone else thinking of going? Also, any U of O people reading this, you should get your ass to Thailand for New Year’s! I will be there, as will Danny and Marta, what more could you possibly need?

K, I’m also recruiting people for a possible February trip to Taiwan. I am sad ‘cause I was going to go to Hokkaido on birthday tickets for the snow festival on the 10th-12th, but Rent is only there for a week, and Rent > Hokkaido, I’m afraid. Did I mention I’m the gayest person in the world? Anyway, it will be a weekend of shopping for bootlegs, doing whatever there is to do in Taiwan, eating, and seeing Rent! Hello, orgasm. I’m pretty sure Cindy and I are doing it for sure, but the same Rent cast (in English, btw, with lots of former Broadway people) will be touring Asia for 3-4 months, so I’m curious where else it’s going to go. Hmmm. Decisions, decisions!

Anyway, people, lemme know if you’re interested in any trips up in hea! K, end boring post.

Another Monday at Work

So, what started off as the worst day ever is actually turning out to be good! Yay. I was tired as hell this morning and just wanted to relax, but I had to fucking work my ass off during my free period in order to prepare stuff for classes. I already had a lot prepared, but I always forget how long it takes to make materials when it has to be multiplied by however many students or groups. Today is the start of the new schedule, so I now have all three grades every single day. I liked my old schedule ‘cause I didn’t have to worry about 1nensei prep until Tuesday, but it will be nice to have a mix of classes every day, too.

Anyway, I was really tired, and my first class went really freaking badly. The class was NOT in the mood to listen to anything and it was just a bad class. I yelled at my kids for the first time, and I think I scared the shit out of them, haha. I don’t really want to yell at them ever, but they were seriously out of control. Good ol’ Yabuchuu!

Second period was the exact same lesson plan for a different 1nensei class, and it amazes me how the same lesson can go so differently. It was a GREAT class and everyone was having fun and smiling and everything. Weird, but good! So, that made me happy.

My last class (I am at lunch now) was 3nensei, and that went really well, too. They worked their asses off on this activity I made for them, even though it was pretty difficult. I was proud of them!

So, yay for good students making Mondays less painful!

A Fan Weekeundo

I had a great weekend, tho it was tooooo short. Thank god next week is another 3-day-er! On Friday night I went out to Ota with Sean and Cindy, and Pete met up with us later on. We were all really damn tired, so we only went out to eat. It was exciting ‘cause we tried new restaurants! Yay! Without cars, it’s difficult to find new places to eat, as there are only so many restaurants near the station (but there are PLENTY of hostess bars!!!). However, we became a little un-lazy and walked a bit further than usual and found a really good soba/udon place. I’ll definitely be heading back! The servings were huge, it was oishii, and it was cheap! After that we went to a really nice Italian place that I didn’t know existed and had DAMN good desserts. Sean, Cindy and I split six small desserts (although I freely admit we are pigs, it really wasn’t that pig-ish, as they were very small desserts, and they offer a 1-item or 2-item dessert thing on the menu). Anyway, I will definitely be heading back there, as well!

After that we met up with Jenny, who was at an enkai with her co-workers. They were at our usual karaoke place, so we popped our heads in, and were coerced into singing Rinda Rinda, hee hee. Jenny, your co-workers are a lot cooler than mine!

I had been looking forward to sleeping in on Saturday morning all week long, so of COURSE I freaking woke up at 8:45 and couldn’t get back to bed! I am officially an old man!!!!

Saturday afternoon I trained to Akagi, where Grant picked me up for our crazy inaka weekend! Oh, inaka is boonies in Japanese. Although no one in the world says boonies, but everyone says inaka here. Anyway. So yeah, Grant picked me up (thanks for not making me take the diesel train!), we went grocery shopping for Sunday’s barbecue, then went back to his place and made dinner. Oh yeah, for those of you that don’t know, Grant lives in Azuma, which is a town in the mountains. It is damn pretty out there!

Anyway, we attempted to watch Finding Neverland, but I’m afraid I didn’t have my Ritalin that day and I didn’t pay attention whatsoever. So, instead we talked while drinking some nasty-ass cheap wine. Let’s just say the first bottle of Carlo Rossi was better than the second bottle, if such a thing is possible.

On Sunday morning Grant showed me around Azuma, which was purty. In the afternoon we barbecued. Well, everyone else barbecued and I encouraged them! It was a ton of fun, although I don’t think my body is happy with the fact that a) I started drinking at 1:00 in the afternoon and b) I literally ate for five hours straight. I’m not even kidding. Despite that (or perhaps because of that), it was a fun barbecue. God, I miss barbecues! I met new people, spoke a shitload of Japanese, ate good food, and had a great time.

So, yeah, a good weekend, indeed! Thanks for the escape from the thriving metropolis known as Yabuzuka, Guranto! I can’t really imagine living in the inaka, but it’s nice to see actual nature every once in a while!


Pictures from my walk around Azuma




Yukari and Grant faithfully take care of the barbecue.....


While I monitor their progress.


Mami's turn



Jeff, Japan-ized Grant and me