ALTs aren’t supposed to be busy!

So this week has been busy at work, wtf?! I was informed like a month ago that I had to give a presentation at the Isesaki Education Center about shougakkou lessons. In fact, the AMAZING title of my lecture (given to me) was, “Useful English Expressions in English Conversation Activities at Elementary Schools.” Yeah, I dunno what that is supposed to mean, either. Some high-up person in the education system in Gunma picked me for it, not because of my amazing teaching abilities (hehe), but because the presentation had to be in Japanese and they somehow knew I could speak?! Bah!

Anyway, I knew a month ago, but of course I waited until Tuesday to actually plan the lecture and make all of the materials for it...meaning that I worked on it the entire work day AND had to stay 2 1/2 hours late! NOT FUN! I made 28 15-page packets, and didn’t realize how that is a HUGE pain in the ass to put together in Japan, the country of not-friendly copy machines (I had to make each page separately, then put them together in a one-man assembly line. Fun times).

So yeah, yesterday was the presentation and it went okay. Donald, another ALT, was in charge of the 2-hour “let’s learn games for shougakkou class” time, and his was really good and of course fun, because it was games. Then came time for my 1-hour presentation, and it was all boring and shit, because I had to talk about what phrases are useful and what aren’t. Yes, that is TERRIBLY exciting. Anyway, I was all worried that it would not be ANYWHERE near an hour, even with group discussion time, but it lasted an hour and would have lasted longer if I hadn’t cut it off?! I don’t know how that worked out. I was talking a mile a minute and I have NOOOOO clue what I said, but hopefully it made sense and wasn’t TOO boring...I have my doubts! Hehe.

In the end it was all okay, as Cindy and I finally got to try the Vietnamese restaurant in Isesaki! It was yummy...a beer and Vietnamese is always a good way to finish a stressful day, yo!

There goes my mission to avoid Japanese doctors...

I was hoping to go the whole two years in Japan without seeing a scary Japanese doctor, but I had to break down and go to a doctor on Monday, sad! Oh, well, I made it a year, at least.

Anyway, the good news is that Dr. Sakamoto kicks fucking ass because he is totally fluent in English! In fact, his English is better than mine! He kept saying all these medical words as if I had a fucking clue what he was talking about, and I was just like “Oh, yeah, mmmhmm!” He lived in Baltimore before, which is good, because that actually knows what he is doing! Tons of Japanese doctors are like, “I don’t know what you have, so here are some antibiotics!” Er, no thank you. The big question is, what the fuck is an English-fluent doctor doing working in Yabuzuka? Sad!

Japanese doctor offices are weird and depressing, though. First of all it was me and like 10 60 year-olds. Second of all, they send you all over the damn place! They don’t do the American style of sending you from the waiting room, to waiting in the medical room. They transfer you from the waiting room to another room where you do something, then back to the waiting room, then to another room where you do something, then back to the waiting room, then back to one of the previous rooms, etc. It is a lot of moving, yo! It took forever, but oh, well.

Anyway, I had some intestinal thing and the doctor was like, “Don’t eat greasy food, spicy food, or cheese.” Um, FUCK THAT ADVICE!!!!!!!! That is like the worst advice you could ever give me!!!!!! So I think that the whole thing happened because the States poisoned me! How sad is that! My body wasn’t used to all that fatty nasty food, then last weekend I had both Chinese food AND pizza with Tabasco all over it, and I nearly died (I am not dramatic or anything). So yeah...I am still gonna eat that shit, so fuck you, medical institution! Hehehehe.

Land of the an ugly-ass language, here I come! (part 2 of 3)

So I hope I get used to the nastiness known as Mandarin in Taiwan, because Cindy and I booked our China tickets yesterday! It feels like we are actually going there now that we have our tickets. Woot. Plus Northwest somehow had the most amazing deal ever…..a multi-city ticket during winter break was only $566?! I don’t know how that is possible, but whatever! Plus it pushes me to just over 60,000 miles on my frequent flier card! Woot! But yeah, yay, China! Time for lots of food and lots of freezing our asses off!

GROOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!

So the teacher that clipped his toenails in the staffroom long ago (well, I am sure he has done it since, but I blogged about it long ago) is currently CLEANING HIS EARS RIGHT NOW!!!!!! Groooosssssss! In the States that would be gross but not dirty, but Asians use the Asian ear pick thing that is wooden and scoops out the earwax…a normal person would use a Kleenex to clean the earwax off the ear pick, but he is using his hands! GROSS GROSS GROSS GROSS GROSS! Do your personal grooming on your own time!!!!